Saturday, September 6, 2008

Night Out

Last night I did something incredibly brave. Well, OK, brave for me, a new momma. I made myself go to the Friday Night Salon - a night out in Dallas - which means we hired our first teen-age babysitter to watch Baby Jack. I was really nervous the entire week and almost backed out a million times. Of course, I felt uneasy about trusting a kid to watch my kid.. But mostly, I think I was sad because it feels like Jack and and I don't have a lot of time together. He is at Nanny Delaney's all day. I pick him up from her house and he eats, takes a bath, and goes to bed at ours. I hate that. But at the same time, I am trying to be OK with raising a "community baby" where people I love and trust help me take care of Jack and give him a more well-rounded life. I love that idea, but it is hard to practice.

I want Jack to love me the best.

Anyway, I did it. I went to the Salon. I only cried once and, really, I was just a little bit teary. Rebecca, the babysitter, was wonderful. When we got home Jack had been fed and was sleeping soundly in his bed. I needn't have worried. He didn't even know I was gone.

I suppose I should be grateful for these days when he doesn't miss me because I know that it won't always be this easy for us to leave for the evening. Someday he'll scream to not be left. On the one hand, this will undoubtedly break my heart. On the other hand, it breaks my heart that he doesn't.

5 comments:

Jen said...

Hey Ginger!!

I can only imagine how difficult that was!! I am was a "community baby" or "latch key kid" and I turned out just fine!! Oh and as you already know, My momma was/is my favorite person in the world!! Still to this day!

I hope you enjoyed your time at the Salon! I know those are important to you!! I hope you're enjoying your time with him this weekend!

Love you

Jen

Chelle said...

Glad you got out. And, start allowing babysitters now, and I have heard, that it's easier when they are older because they know even know Mommy and Daddy are leaving now, they'll be back.

Andy and I are going to a movie today. Luckily, we have many surrogate "aunties" from church who have been clamoring to babysit. praise the Lord!

Glad you had a good night, and found a good babysitter!!!

Deidra said...

Ginger if you leave him some what often enough he won't cry Zack is a super star when we leave him because he is use to it for better or for worse. honestly he is probably glad to not be with me for a little while. Any way glad it went well. love Ya

Staci said...

I'm so proud of you!! If not for Girls Night Out, I'd have been committed years ago! When they scream for you not to leave them, it's only heartbreaking the first few times. There have been days when the cute elderly lady in the grocery line, oohing and aahhing over M and N, has said something like, "Oh I could just take you home with me!" and I've thought "Do you really mean it? For how long? Let me just get your phone number."

Seriously though, you are an adorable mama. This is my first year to have the kids in full time care and it SUCKS!!! The guilt is driving me crazy. And a big part of my frusration is that they like it so much!!! On one hand I want them to be safe, happy and well adjusted, but on the other hand, I don't want them to have quite so much fun without me!

LBelle said...

I heard you did great on Salon Night....

and thanks so much for listing me as an accomplice! That is kind of you! how did you do that little bit of coding? I like that idea and will have to see if I can figure it out as well.

I saw on your other blog that Wern said she was once a 16 year old idiot. She was never, I repeat, never an idiot.

The biased political email did not come from me by the way. It came from dad, and she won't let him get away with a single bit of it. I don't think I've ever seen her so punchy!